You got something to add?

Say it, we'll post it right here. Write us a message and I'll put it up. Tell us we're fuckers. Challenge us to a fight. Throw a steamer at our face.

Mail it to sov at evilcycling.com

And zoom in real close on that chainstay shit to see what I dream of the Evil boys doing!

Emily is a fine example of how to live an Evil life. I'm getting a little weepy just thinking about the wonderful people who support us and suggest that we fuck them.

Hay this is Jay in the Atlanta. We found the site and we're planning a keg party (with our new kegerator) to get all the local bikers over with hopes of forming an ATeviL team. What do we need to do? Do we really have to race?

The answer is no, you don't have to race. In fact, we abhor racism in all its forms. You will, however, have to do something a bit more Evil than a "keg party." I mean, maybe if you're kid's turning 6 you should throw him a keg party, but after that I recommend the harder stuff. 

As for anyone else looking to join up, there's an essay component, an obstacle course component, and an evil deeds component to entry into the organization. Just e-mail Sov.

I have a question
I'm sure it's extremely difficult to become a member
of the She-Evil Cycling Clan, but let me put this out
there...
What if I were willing to have the Evil logo tatooed
somewhere on my body - would that put me into
contention?  I've been seriously considering another
tatoo (got my first one for my last birthday).

I'm going to go ahead and say that, yes, if you would like to be on She-Evil a logo tattoo will get you there. Of course, it would be just like us to say that, have you get the tattoo, then deny you entry.

I first saw Team Evil while sitting on the Snake in 2003. Everyone has the same idea -- let's make a team wearing all white, called Good. There's a reason it'll never happen...Good isn't fucking funny.

Why do I want to join Evil? In a town so naturally full of Evil, I'd be hardly noticed as I meticulously plan the eradication of all 4-wheeled death machines on its streets. Except mine, because my car's fuckin' sweet and I need it to drive to races. But those without an excuse must pay.

Besides, wouldn't I have looked so much cooler having been in Evil wear in the attached pic? Granted, blue urban camo is undeniably fucking cool. But nothing beats Evil. And those cocksuckers on Team DFL would finally have to kiss my ass.

No need to mention God, he doesn't hang out here. We keep his cathedrals around because they make for good scenery. But we're pretty much drunk, naked and fucking the hell out of each other. Got an itch? There's nine ways to scratch it. Just say the word.

Evil's where it's at, man, and San Francisco's got Evil all over. It's time we bought the T-Shirt.

If honored with membership, I'd proudly take the Jersey and the Bib Shorts. A cap would be cool... and all the Evil stickers I can mount. Pictures will be taken. Oh yes, they will.

Right on brotha! Now there's a string of statements I can fully support. Also, way to go knocking out the whole peloton in that picture. Evil deeds to not go unrewarded... your prize awaits you in Hell.

So I am scanning the Evil web site, as I do from time to time when I want to dig up happy memories about RAGBRAI 2003 and our time spent with Evil crew. When I come across an e-mail from John referring to the lovely ladies that are on your web site (myself included) as "whores." Excuse me John but I am no whore. A bead whore...YES, but I am damn proud of those beads! So John remove the bike seat from your ass and lighten the fuck up.

Lots of Love to the Evil Team and the other whores out there.......Lindsay

(and just a little FYI for Chevil...I got my own hat to rock next year!)

Yeah! Screw that guy. The fuck does he know?

It's not spandex, that's the color of our skin thank you very much. We'll take the PBR anyway.

Hello,
What exactly is Ragby? How does one win that? I looked at the web site. It does not seem the name evil applies. Maybe if the team was an anti-social/heretical in both thought and deed. Possibly animal sacrifices and gang rape (male or female take your pick) on RAGBRAI my warrant the name "Evil".  Doesn't seem like a felony offense between the whole lot of you. I would change the team name to team "SCAT" with all this Chort anal reference flying around.

Please do not fill my in box up with this crap. I got on this list from bicycle racing not for morons like you to fill my in box with scat.

Thank You,
Michael 

Well, well, well, ain't we surly. I'll fill your box with scat - all warm and steamy bro. He sounds like your typical roadie, though. Probably looking for a girlfriend that reminds him of himself. Probably would never leave the house if he could find a way to fuck himself. So sad.

Holy crap. I never thought I'd find a Spanish-speaking person who's English was worse than my Spanish but...

Dear Sir,

I am writing to firstly congratulate you for your activities. These are offering example to people.

We are youngs, between 20-23 years old. We like sport and we ride on bike (duathlon,MTB,Road). we are looking for supplier,but this region is damaged and replies are refusal.

While,we are riding with a local high school club.We are thinking about what we can do for yours. So, we request you reclame-material that you don´t need anymore,previous years or remaining,as: jerseys, shorts, etc. We need five unities. We take part in some championships being very difficult for students like us,without resources own.

In order to end,thank you for your attention and Happy Year from Spain.

Yours Sincerely,

F.J.Linage

(SPAIN)

I think if we are offering example to people then the world is fucked. The region is damaged? Kick-ass! Maybe Biddle showed up after a few burritos and damaged it.

And, let me get this straight, you want my old shorts? Ok, but you're going to have to wrestle them away from the haz-mat team that comes monthly to take them away to the Nevada desert..

If you can tell what this half-wit is saying please e-mail us and help. He seems to be lost in some sort of delusional reverie.

Youse Guys must think you hot shit. All fa up with no place to go, you trying to do what in Hawaii? my home town! da brudda's goin bust you face! I see you lily white shaved leg panties comin ova hea, Hell you can't make it up Tantalus let alone trying to beat Ray Brust AKA "The Colnago Kid". Bring It On you mahu's oh you who modify the photos by putting your evil logo on the greats of cycling. may your souls twist in the flames of eternal agony

As a matter of fact, I AM all fa up. And me and my white shaved leg PANTIES don't need to burn in the eternal flames of agony, just reading your well versed letter has taken me there already my brother.

Hey Sov and the rest of you Evil fuckers, can I play too? I got me an evil patch. http://mojoe.unicyclist.com/coker9.jpg Won it at the Homie Fall Fest as a matter 'o fact. I wear the patch with pride every day when I commute to work on my giant fucking unicycle. I carried a frozen fucking turkey home in my messenger bag Friday. Gobble Gobble. 36 inches of fun boys. Guess that makes those 29er bikes a fad of the past eh?? Love your site. You fucks update it a lot, and that keeps cummin' back for more. Even put a link to you at my lame ass web site. http://mojoe.unicyclist.com/ Cheers and beers............Mojoe

Right on my man, right on. whatever keeps you on two... er... one wheel.

Here we go....

What a load of crap. You ain't evil. Probably ain't even mean. Pansys. Tricycle-ridin', booger-pickin', white trash homos.

- - - - Sincerely, Bob

I put this one up for the whole group to answer. Clark cranked it out of the park.

That's what I'm fuckin' talkin' about - Oh, and Bob p-a-n-s-i-e-s would be the correct spelling you backwoods goat-fucker.

John hits the nail right on the head:

It's guys like you who ruin biking for the rest of us God-fearin Christian folk. Everyday I commute to work I pray to the Lord to keep me safe from the the bumpers,fenders and hoods of Satan's Spawn.

Someday you will be judged for the filth that you promote and when that day comes you will be forced to spend an eternity in the fires of hell, seperated from God and the rest of his followers. Yes that's right, know it, you will be burning in hell. You and your kind will be spending an eternity in HELL!! Do you know how long eternity is?

Those whores you show on your web page will be there too, for an eternity. Whores and eternity......

...hmm guess there's no problem there keep up the good work boys.

Just for that, we'll send you a free Evil sticker. Get us your address and the US Postal Service will bring you a little Evil on us.

This 'un's pretty cool:

Captain & Crew, 15 years ago, I packed away my racing persona and traveled to the far off, mysterious land of my ancestors, Iowa....

For two summers, I shaved the silhouette of that blessed land into my scalp and every day lovingly drew the route in ink on flesh, while the scent of corn, soybeans and beer carved it's way into my heart...Foolishly that same organ which took me laughingly along the blacktop with my pals in July transported me to Taiwan, far away from the fun that is the RAGBRAI...

When I saw that the Des Moines corporate newspaperboys were once again taking the same northern route that I first did 15 years ago and that I was trapped on a besieged island paradise (for riding, that is) I shut myself away with long tropical climbs with stifling heat and humidity, trying not to think about the fun.... Then a link from DrunkCyclist led to Dave's posts in _DailyPeloton_ and I knew that somehow, I would be back, yes, back to Iowa.

Gentlemen, I'm sure that you have been inundated with many requests for all of the EVIL schwag. What is left? I desire 6 stickers, 2 patches and one of the best cycling chapeaus that the world has ever seen.

Let me know how to pay and it shall be done.

Yours in cycling,

"IowaHead"

Marj sent us this one:

11/09/2002 "i am fuking sik of getting drunk and then something bad will happen and because i was there i was meant to have done it fuk everyone i got hit with a cop flashlight the other night it fuking hurt a lot and i got my favourite t shirt dirty it has blood on it oh no"

Not really sure where she's going with this one, but I can certainly vibe on the tragedy of blood stains on your fav shirt. I think they hit Marj on the spelling portion of the brain, though.

This one's fun.

11/09/2002 (i've seen you fuckers on the ragby: you're lame asses, that's what you are.) after checking out your site, i have this to say: you are trying to do too many things. either concentrate on improving your website, or spend more time training. as it is, they BOTH suck. my suggestion? work on the website. takes less skill and fewer abilities.

--kim

Kim, we have this to say.

We think it's you who is trying to do too many things - like typing while also listening to "the voices" for example.

First of all, you may have seen us on RAGBRAI (the Register's Annual Great Bike Ride Across Iowa), but we're fairly certain that we did not participate in the RAGBY (the Register's Annual Great Bachelor Yank) - though you must've had fun there.

Second, our asses may be lame, but that's only from all the glory hole fucking we receive daily from our cellmates.

Third, our riding couldn't possibly improve. Our Train of Death has no equal and I think this is well documented. So, by asserting that both our riding and our site "suck" you are equating them. If we could not possibly ride faster - and I personally challenge you to try to best us - then our website must also be unimprovable. Get it? Probably not.

Lastly, capital letters are our friends. They help us communicate. Give them a shot.